a5c7b9f00b When werewolf chief Jack Ferris is accidentally killed in a strip club, the girls who work there have until the next full moon before his bloodthirsty wolfpack seek murderous retribution. Despite its unimaginative title (this is just one of many predictable &#39;— vs —&#39; films to have surfaced on DVD in recent years), I was willing to give Strippers vs Werewolves the benefit of the doubt, but having just suffered through what I can only describean hour and half of absolute puerile drivel I&#39;m now more than happy to pounce on it and give it the critical mauling it deserves.<br/><br/>There are countless reasons to hate on this film, but I&#39;ll start by addressing the obvious ones: the strippers and the werewolves…<br/><br/>After years of teasing fans on Hollyoaks and in assorted mags, I was most interested in seeing Ali Bastianone of the movie&#39;s principle strippers: would she finally get &#39;em out for the lads? Would she heck (damn you Bastian for still having a shred of dignity even when your career is on the skids). Similarly, Emmerdale strumpet Adele Silva and Hostel babe Barbara Nedeljakova fail to get nekkid (despite neither girl being the shy or retiring type), leaving the task of baring all to a few complete unknowns desperate for exposure.<br/><br/>As farthe werewolves are concerned, plastic fangs, rubber ears and crap facial prosthetic appliances (that make the actors look like over-sized rodents) are the order of the day, the dreadful make-up eliciting far more laughs than the supposedly humorous script.<br/><br/>Gimmicky editing proves to be almostirritatingthe lack of nudity from the leading ladies, with an overuse of novelty scene wipes, more split-screen than all of DePalma&#39;s films combined, and absolutely shocking &#39;comic book&#39; images (achieved by using one of the standard filters in Photoshop) making this even more of a chore to sit through. Strippers vs Werewolves also suffers from lousy dialogue, some cringe-worthy acting, and weak gore.<br/><br/>On the plus side, Simon Phillips is mildly amusinga nerdy vampire killer (and, rather unbelievably, the boyfriend of Nedeljakova&#39;s goth stripper Raven), Lucy Pinder appearsa sexy vampiress, and Bastian and Nedeljakova both sport black stockings, sussies and basques for the film&#39;s finale (not naked, but still nice!), but none of this is enough for me to want to rate the film any higher than 3/10. I won&#39;t beat around the bush. The acting is horrible, the script risible, the makeup and prosthetics are dire and probably the least said about the plot the better. With the number of ex-soap actors in it, perhaps it&#39;s not surprising that the film seems to derive much of it&#39;s inspiration and ethos from Crossroads and El Dorado. Put simply, it&#39;s bad. I guessed that from the title. What surprised me is that it manages to cross that line from &#39;bad&#39; to &#39;so bad it&#39;s good&#39;. I&#39;ll admit I didn&#39;t know it was supposed to be a comedy when I watched it and I wouldn&#39;t have guessed they were trying to be intentionally funny, but looking on ita (bad) horror - it was hilarious. I nearly gave it an 8.
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